Friday, May 22, 2009

A case against charity AKA massacre in the garden

I like to do stuff myself because I like things done a certain way. I'm not a perfectionist or anything, I just don't like my stuff ruined. Some of you may have noticed this if you've been to my house for dinner and I say "No thanks...no, really, no thank you.." when you ask to do my dishes. I'm not trying to be nice, I really don't want you doing my dishes. It usually means more work for me later. After everyone leaves I usually unload the still dirty dishes and the glasses loaded into the bottom rack and the ice cream scoop that clearly says on the handle "do not put in dishwasher" out and redo all of it. My dishwasher can't get large amounts of food off the dishes and if glasses go in the bottom they'll crack. Stuff breaks then I'm mad but I feel like I'm not allowed be mad because people were just trying to help...etc. But this isn't about dishes. This is about my garden. My very nice neighbor stopped by the other day as I was mowing my lawn/dandelion forest and said if I wanted him to he'd come and whack the weeds around the edge of my yard. I have a weed whacker but I just don't know how to use it so I eagerly said YES Thank you that would be fantastic! He was really quick about it too. The next day I came home from work late and could see in the dark that the weeds along the driveway were gone. Wow that looks great I thought. In the morning I noticed it was whacked around my tree in front too. I checked on my day lily and shasta daisy and they were still there although most the daffodils were chopped down and all the snap dragons were gone. Oh well I thought, the daffodils just won't look as good next year and the snap dragons were really for Bryan so who cares. My neighbor didn't know those were plants I didn't want cut down. I was a little sad to see the long tall grass gone next to the horse pasture. It looked so wild back there I hadn't been cutting it on purpose. Oh well, it's not important, he's so nice...Then this morning I went out to water my seedlings and my herb garden and I actually screamed out loud... ...all my new herbs were gone, plus a few old friends. Oh the horror! The herbs I waited in line at the Red Butte Garden sale to buy. The one's I'd fought off old ladies in swine flu masks to get. Assassinated. Massacred. Annihilated. The strange thing is, these didn't look like weeds, they even had labels in front of each one, and they were in the middle of a garden, all weeded and in nice neat little clumps of plants waiting to be picked and used for cooking. Why did he kill my herb garden? Why?
Can you not see the labels here? Lime Thyme... Maybe that one last sprig can bring back the plant...Obviously this is...or was some marjoram.
This English Thyme even got it's label attacked.This was my old "well established" thyme plant tucked away behind the sage. It wasn't safe.There used to be a tarragon plant here so big it blocked the pipe and most the wall... There was a mint plant there too on the right. You can see it's label lying there in the carnage as a casualty like a dead carcase. I had a nice Utah native white flower that was in full bloom growing in this terrible clay spot right here blocking the ugly window well...gone. If it does recover it will be too late for new flowers.
What do I say to him? Do I tell him he killed at least 10 nice plants and please stay out of my yard? Do I tell him he owes me 50 bucks? Do I tell him I figured out how to use my own weed whacker so I don't need him to commit anymore murder in my garden? Do I put up a fence and lock him out? Or do I just go cut down some of his plants and not say anything? I'm just glad I've procrastinated planing my new lavender plants along the fence and they were still safe in my garage window. I'm sure they would have been toast, just like this large chunk of my clematis plant.
All morning I could only think of this story I'd read on ThePioneerWoman website last year. I'm glad I decided to plant all the ornamental grasses I'd bought in my containers this year or I'm sure they would have been part of the bloodshed as well. Thankfully they made it out unscathed... except for the emotional scares of seeing their fellow transplants murdered in cold blood.

6 comments:

The Toll Family said...

Jerry sends you his deepest sympathy and condolences, seriously.

TheMom said...

So sorry dear daughter - at least it wasn't your dad! I know how you would handle it if it was him - he would not it away with it. At least it was things that will grow and not your door or car or ....

Megan D. said...

Oh no! That makes me so sad. I hope things grow back. I would tell him you know how to use your own weed whacker now and that he doesn't!

The Adams Family said...

This is really awful. It makes me want to cry.

Candi Criddle said...

I weep.

I might have suggested something funny and quipy right here,

but

it is not funny.

It is a deep sadness at the very fabric of life.

ddrussel said...

What a horrible thing!

Robert Frost said good fences make good neighbors... Learn to use the weed whacker. It will be liberating.

I still have two spearmint containers on my kitchen counter and you can have one if you need...